The English language

Here's a little poem for those who want to improve their command of the English language;

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.

Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it's written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.

Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.

Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Bouquet, wallet, mallet, chalet.
Blood and flood are not like food,
Nor is mould like should and would.
Viscous, viscount, load and broad,
Toward, to forward, to reward.
And your pronunciation's OK
When you correctly say croquet,
Rounded, wounded, grieve and sieve,
Friend and fiend, alive and live.

Ivy, privy, famous; clamour
And enamour rhyme with hammer.
River, rival, tomb, bomb, comb,
Doll and roll and some and home.
Stranger does not rhyme with anger,
Neither does devour with clangour.
Souls but foul, haunt but aunt,
Font, front, wont, want, grand, and grant,
Shoes, goes, does. Now first say finger,
And then singer, ginger, linger,
Real, zeal, mauve, gauze, gouge and gauge,
Marriage, foliage, mirage, and age.

Query does not rhyme with very,
Nor does fury sound like bury.
Dost, lost, post and doth, cloth, loth.
Job, nob, bosom, transom, oath.
Though the differences seem little,
We say actual but victual.
Refer does not rhyme with deafer.
Foeffer does, and zephyr, heifer.
Mint, pint, senate and sedate;
Dull, bull, and George ate late.
Scenic, Arabic, Pacific,
Science, conscience, scientific.

Liberty, library, heave and heaven,
Rachel, ache, moustache, eleven.
We say hallowed, but allowed,
People, leopard, towed, but vowed.
Mark the differences, moreover,
Between mover, cover, clover;
Leeches, breeches, wise, precise,
Chalice, but police and lice;
Camel, constable, unstable,
Principle, disciple, label.

Petal, panel, and canal,
Wait, surprise, plait, promise, pal.
Worm and storm, chaise, chaos, chair,
Senator, spectator, mayor.
Tour, but our and succour, four.
Gas, alas, and Arkansas.
Sea, idea, Korea, area,
Psalm, Maria, but malaria.
Youth, south, southern, cleanse and clean.
Doctrine, turpentine, marine.

Compare alien with Italian,
Dandelion and battalion.
Sally with ally, yea, ye,
Eye, I, ay, aye, whey, and key.
Say aver, but ever, fever,
Neither, leisure, skein, deceiver.
Heron, granary, canary.
Crevice and device and aerie.

Face, but preface, not efface.
Phlegm, phlegmatic, ass, glass, bass.
Large, but target, gin, give, verging,
Ought, out, joust and scour, scourging.
Ear, but earn and wear and tear
Do not rhyme with here but ere.
Seven is right, but so is even,
Hyphen, roughen, nephew Stephen,
Monkey, donkey, Turk and jerk,
Ask, grasp, wasp, and cork and work.

Pronunciation -- think of Psyche!
Is a paling stout and s*****?
Won't it make you lose your wits,
Writing groats and saying grits?
It's a dark abyss or tunnel:
Strewn with stones, stowed, solace, gunwale,
Islington and Isle of Wight,
Housewife, verdict and indict.

Finally, which rhymes with enough --
Though, through, plough, or dough, or cough?
Hiccough has the sound of cup.
My advice is to give up!

Geklaut aus dem Forum "Wild Camping. co. uk"

Hier findest Du vielleicht schon, was Du suchst: Artikel auf eBay oder versuchs hier bei Amazon

well , at least it`s teaching vocabs :D :D :D

best ones from
Jan

elinor hat geschrieben:My advice is to give up!

Never! :D

This is relatively simple compared with Bärndütsch.

elinor hat geschrieben:Here's a little poem for those who want to improve their command of the English language;

To command the English language...? :roll:
Very funny... :?

elinor hat geschrieben:Geklaut aus dem Forum "Wild Camping. co. uk"

...who has copied it from Gerard Nolst Trenité - The Chaos
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Wehe man dreht die Irregularities durch den Fleischwolf der Dialekte:

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Wie konnten wir je annehmen, dass wir diese Sprache beherrschen!

Herzlichen Dank Elinor,
das wird eine schöne Beschäftigung für unsere 4 Personen-Urlaubsgruppe nach Weihnachten.
Celso

Great! Thanks a lot.

I love it. My pupils won't.


Have a nice Christmas.

Uta

Ich erinnere mich ganz düster an einen Phonetikkurs zu Beginn meines Englischstudiums. Da habe ich eine Menge von dem obigen Wörtern lernen dürfen!

Muss I do understood das? :lol:

Do sie ( the English speaking) pieples understand the unterscheed between: Mainz, hellau und Kölle, I love you? (In Kurzform übersetzt: Alaaf) :lol:


Frank

For those who want to improve their command of poetry:

Poems tend to rhyme and rhythm.
Else they drift to self contention.
Which makes them any kind of -ism.
And therefore hardly worth to mention.


In the beautiful yet little polyglot city of Nuremberg they rhyme about their English proficiency:

"Wieh schbieg Inklisch wärri well. Breggalasweis und ned su schnell."

Whoever thinks, the remainder of Germany was any better, proverbially is "on sse wuddwäi".

Senk juh for träweling (As Deutsche Bahn puts it) and Märri Krissmiss!

LJS

ottomar hat geschrieben:Wehe man dreht die Irregularities durch den Fleischwolf der Dialekte:

--> Link

Wie konnten wir je annehmen, dass wir diese Sprache beherrschen!

Nettes Video. Leider zu lang und ab dem dritten Versuch hört sich der junge Sprachkünstler etwa so an wie ich, wenn ich als Nordlicht versuche südliche Idiome nachzuahmen.
Da hilft auch die Häufung des F-Wortes nicht wirklich - sogar das hört sich in realiter anders an.

LJS

Righty right my droogy,

Dafür jede Menge Verwirrung auf der Wortebene (Lexeme, Ihr wisst schon):

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Der phantastische Hugh Laurie!!!

The leicht different Weihnachtsgedicht


When the snow falls wunderbar
And the children happy are,
When the Glatteis on the street,
And we all a Glühwein need,
Then you know, es ist soweit:
She is here, the Weihnachtszeit.
Every Parkhaus ist besetzt,
Weil die people fahren jetzt
All to Kaufhof, Mediamarkt,
Kriegen nearly Herzinfarkt.
Shopping hirnverbrannte things
And the Christmasglocke rings.

Merry Christmas, merry Christmas,
Hear the music, see the lights,
Frohe Weihnacht, Frohe Weihnacht,
Merry Christmas allerseits ...

Mother in the kitchen bakes
Schoko-, Nuss- and Mandelkeks,
Daddy in the Nebenraum
Schmücks a Riesen-Weihnachtsbaum.
He is hanging auf the balls,
Then he from the Leiter falls ...
Finally the Kinderlein
To the Zimmer kommen rein
And es sings the family
Schauerlich: "Oh, Chistmastree!"
And then jeder in the house
Is packing die Geschenke aus.

Merry Christmas, merry Christmas,
Hear the music, see the lights,
Frohe Weihnacht, Frohe Weihnacht,
Merry Christmas allerseits ...

Mama finds unter the Tanne
Eine brandnew Teflon-Pfanne,
Papa gets a Schlips and Socken,
Everybody does frohlocken.
President speaks in TV,
All around is Harmonie,
Bis mother in the kitchen runs:
Im Ofen burns the Weihnachtsgans.
And so comes die Feuerwehr
With Tatü, tata daher,
And they bring a long, long Schlauch
And a long, long Leiter auch.
And they schrei then "Wasser marsch!",
Christmas evening is im A ....

Merry Christmas, merry Christmas,
Hear the music, see the lights,
Frohe Weihnacht, Frohe Weihnacht,
Merry Christmas allerseits.

merry Xmas
Joachim

Equal goes it loose


Gleich geht's los Soll ein Herr Lübke der Queen im Theater zugeflüstert haben.


Pijpop